Adam and I have shared a car for 9 months now. We didn't set out to have only one car, but when Adam was in an accident that totaled his car, we decided to trade in my old car for something more reliable and make do with one at least until it was paid off. I'll be honest, the first couple months were rough. We both worked downtown so it was easy for him to drop me off, and if I needed the car during the day I could drop him off. But it was hard adjusting to not being able to hop in the car at the end of the day and come home. It forced us to communicate with each other more and be aware of our schedules. Now that it is nice out I can easily walk to and from work, but some days that isn't the most convenient either. But we've adjusted and while there are still times when it's not convenient we're making it work.
Then Adam got a new job 5 weeks ago, that wasn't downtown and it involves more driving during the day and our one-car household doesn't work so well anymore. That means we've (really Adam) has been car shopping. I appreciate having a car to take me where I need to go, but shopping for a car is about the last thing on my list of things I want to do. The good thing is that while we need another car sooner rather than later, we can make do with one for now and wait to find something in our price range.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
self editing
Does anyone else who blogs self-edit? (as i was re-reading this i added the hyphen between self and edit) Maybe it's because of my job, where I am constantly editing myself and others, but when I start to type in this empty white box, there are times when I can't make my fingers communicate with the keys for fear of what they will say. I know that contradicts the point of having a blog. This is supposed to be a place for me to share with family and friends and just put things out there for someone to read, but there is an insecurity of what people will think that I struggle to overcome. This worrying about what other people think has plagued for a long time. Maybe it's part of being a perfectionist. Or maybe I'm more of a private person than I realized. I love to read other people's blogs, and get a peek into their lives, but I haven't seemed to want to reveal much about my own. Part of it is that I need to get over myself and open up to people. I'm always asking other people questions, focusing attention on them rather than myself, but how often to I let them get to know me?
my job
In January I started a new job (at the same publishing company). I am now product editor for Country Home magazine. I loved the people I worked with at Remodel, but I was never passionate about the content. My new job is a much better fit. Not many people can say they shop for products and look for trends and get paid for it. I still have a lot to learn, but so far I'm loving it. Last week I spent 3 days in Dallas with a group of editors touring a gift show, going to design centers, and shopping. We were wined and dined and treated like royalty. I know I have a pile of story folders waiting for me when I get to my cube on Monday, but that doesn't even sound so bad.
Sunday, June 01, 2008
why blog?
I've had this blog for over 2 years now, but my posting goes in starts and stops. For a few months I'll be good about posting most weeks, keeping readers updated on what's going on in my and Adam's life and then I'll go through a dry phase where I forget to blog or just don't make time for it. One reason for this is that I haven't decided what I want this blog to be. Should it just be a place I record what's going on in our lives and post pictures? Or am I willing to commit to it and start writing creatively and personally about my thoughts and feelings? The latter is what I've wanted to do, but haven't had the nerve to do.
I recently read this article in the New York Times magazine about a young woman whose life was a blog (it was her job, literally) and it made me think more about this medium of blogging and what it means to me and this generation. Some people are so willing to pour their hearts out in cyberspace revealing personal details and feelings that they don't even share with their closest friends. Why is that? I think part of the reason is that we long to be known, even our deepest darkest secrets. It's liberating to release all those thoughts and emotions to the great unknown regardless of whether any one is reading it. But when do we go too far? When do we get to the point where we have compromised ourselves, our reputation, our relationships by revealing every gritty detail online? There are times when I think it is better to keep things to yourself or better yet actually talk to someone about it rather than hide behind a blog. That said I'm the queen of hiding behind words whether it's a letter, an e-mail, or an IM conversation. I am full of words and thoughts and emotions, but I am much more comfortable hiding behind the letters than see your reaction to the words. Sometimes this is a blessing, but more often than not I think it's a curse. It's a blessing when I'm able to encourage friends with a card or note when I can't see them, but it's a curse when it means that I avoid confrontation and the hard conversations that nobody likes, but really shouldn't be avoided. I have always been this way. It was the way I was raised, the way I learned to deal with conflict (by avoiding it). In many ways our technologically savvy society has only allowed me and others like me to be this way. We hide behind text messages, facebook comments, and e-mail instead of learning to interact with people face to face. Sometimes I wonder if given the choice if people would rather give up one on one time with a person than their cell phone or computer.
Aside from not wanting confrontation (because then someone might be mad at me) I am a writer by nature and that means I can form my thoughts so much better and say what I mean without being flustered much better in an e-mail or letter than in a conversation. I know that really isn't an excuse for not talking to someone, but it sure is easier.
Those who know me well know that while I do send lovely letters and e-mails, when I'm really comfortable with you and ready to open up I'm all about quality time (it's my primary love language). To me quality time is sitting over a cup of coffee and talking for hours, one on one, going for a long walk (my mom taught me this), or just sitting and chatting. So I guess, all this is to say maybe I will start revealing more personal details on my blog, but if you really want to see the true Andrea, meet me for coffee or join me on a long walk. And I'm curious what other people think about our society's dependence on electronic communication.
I recently read this article in the New York Times magazine about a young woman whose life was a blog (it was her job, literally) and it made me think more about this medium of blogging and what it means to me and this generation. Some people are so willing to pour their hearts out in cyberspace revealing personal details and feelings that they don't even share with their closest friends. Why is that? I think part of the reason is that we long to be known, even our deepest darkest secrets. It's liberating to release all those thoughts and emotions to the great unknown regardless of whether any one is reading it. But when do we go too far? When do we get to the point where we have compromised ourselves, our reputation, our relationships by revealing every gritty detail online? There are times when I think it is better to keep things to yourself or better yet actually talk to someone about it rather than hide behind a blog. That said I'm the queen of hiding behind words whether it's a letter, an e-mail, or an IM conversation. I am full of words and thoughts and emotions, but I am much more comfortable hiding behind the letters than see your reaction to the words. Sometimes this is a blessing, but more often than not I think it's a curse. It's a blessing when I'm able to encourage friends with a card or note when I can't see them, but it's a curse when it means that I avoid confrontation and the hard conversations that nobody likes, but really shouldn't be avoided. I have always been this way. It was the way I was raised, the way I learned to deal with conflict (by avoiding it). In many ways our technologically savvy society has only allowed me and others like me to be this way. We hide behind text messages, facebook comments, and e-mail instead of learning to interact with people face to face. Sometimes I wonder if given the choice if people would rather give up one on one time with a person than their cell phone or computer.
Aside from not wanting confrontation (because then someone might be mad at me) I am a writer by nature and that means I can form my thoughts so much better and say what I mean without being flustered much better in an e-mail or letter than in a conversation. I know that really isn't an excuse for not talking to someone, but it sure is easier.
Those who know me well know that while I do send lovely letters and e-mails, when I'm really comfortable with you and ready to open up I'm all about quality time (it's my primary love language). To me quality time is sitting over a cup of coffee and talking for hours, one on one, going for a long walk (my mom taught me this), or just sitting and chatting. So I guess, all this is to say maybe I will start revealing more personal details on my blog, but if you really want to see the true Andrea, meet me for coffee or join me on a long walk. And I'm curious what other people think about our society's dependence on electronic communication.
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